Black and White ~ Punishment

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Darling, if you didn’t know what to say you should have asked or not said anything at all. I get that you’re nervous to be at this party with such a beautiful woman like me but do not embarrass me in front of my friends again! Now when we get back out there, I want you as charming as ever or you won’t be allowed to worship my feet tonight. Got it?

Yes Ma’am.

Good boy.

Black and White ~ Discipline

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She really wasn’t kidding when she said that she was going to get serious about his discipline. He was sure that she would be in a good mood today. She went to that fancy brunch with her friends that she’d been talking about all week. And he supposed that she was still in a good mood and yet she didn’t hesitate assign him a punishment.

She said they would still have their play time later that day. And that of course the punishment wouldn’t wait. She said he needed this and he deserved this.

He hung his head and entered the room thinking that the weight of her gaze would crush him into dust.

He should have just done his chores like he was supposed to.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Black and White ~ 1

22115f0a5aec6769d57e71c4cfd776d8 I know I haven’t been here lately. I’ve been over here a lot. But I’m not gone! And, in an attempt to get back on a schedule, I’ll be posting a black and white FemDom photo about every Friday accompanied by my comments or perhaps a poem. There’s something just so alluring about a black and white photo especially one as powerful as this. Beautiful legs just perfect for hosiery and an obedient boy at her feet, right where he belongs.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Be Careful What You Wish For (Short Fiction)

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I watched his face carefully. His eyes were closed tightly and his breathing was labored but he remaining as still as he could. I knew he expected more, but I also suspected that he would not be able to handle any more. I rubbed my hand over his red flesh and he flinched for the first time.

“That’s enough.” I said softly. This wasn’t a punishment, after all. This was only to show him what would happen if he were to disobey me.

He looked up at me confused for a moment.

“That’s all for today. You took more than I thought you would. Were you counting?”

He nodded slowly.

“How many?”

He thought for a moment, then he took a breath. “Twenty-two?”

“Is that a question?”

“No. It… it was twenty-two.”

I sat my implement down and walked around him slowly. “Are you sure? It wasn’t Twenty-four? What about twenty-one?” I could see him hesitate for a moment.

“Umm…”

“Maybe we should start over? Then you can count again. Do you want to change your answer?”

“No, Ma’am. It was twenty-two.”

I smiled at him. “Very good.”

I stepped back until my legs touched the edge of the bed and I sat. “Come here.” I curled my finger at him.

He got to his knees slowly and crawled over to me. I received him taking his face into my hands and pulling closer kissing him deeply.

I broke the kiss.

“Yes.” He whispered.

“Yes, What?”

“Yes I still want to belong to you.”

I smiled. “I wasn’t going to ask.” I said. “I’ve asked you enough and I believe you now. I’m deciding for myself that you belong to me and there’s no going back. You know that don’t you? You’ll never be the same again. I own you totally and completely; every part of you is mine now.”

“Yes, Ma’am. Of course, Ma’am.”

“Do you like belonging to me?”

“Yes, Ma’am. It feels so good to belong to you. I wish to never leave your side.”

I smiled that sadistic smile that he loved. “Be careful what you wish for.”

–Miss Ari ^_^

 

P.S. I’ve recently created a second blog where I’ll be posting more personal stories and fun happenings from my current relationship: Here.

Q & A: How Do I Punish Him When He Enjoys Spanking?

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No I don’t believe you have forgotten your place. You just need a reminder.

I can tell you right off the bat that so many women worry needlessly about this sort of thing.

The first thing we have to think about is that regardless of whether or not someone enjoys spanking, it is still corporal punishment. A spanking, to a submissive man that enjoys it, still serves the purpose of reinforcing the dynamic of the relationship. It helps the Dominant to feel dominant and it helps the submissive to feel submissive to the Dominant. Even if he were to beg you for it and thank you for it afterward, it still has aspects of humiliation to it.

A masochist still feels pain and through receiving pain form their Dominant, they can reenter a submissive mind frame. In this case, corporal punishment can still serve as a corrective tool for slipping behaviors.

But let’s back track for a moment, because not all submissive are like this. In fact, most men that enjoy spanking enjoy it in a sensual sense. It is a level where it is still painful but not to a level that they would deem “too painful”. If you are seeking to use spankings as a punishment for this type of man, you need only step it up a notch. And this can be in intensity or in the implement that you choose. For instance, a man may enjoy being paddled, but would try to avoid the strap or the PVC tube at all costs.

Only if your skepticism still stands at this point, would I suggest that you start getting creative. There are, of course, other ways to discipline your submissive man including giving him rigorous physical tasks, chores and errands, or humiliation methods such as the many variations of corner time.

All other complications aside, it does come down to how you feel about it. If you don’t like the idea of spanking him to a point where he sees it as punishment, then you should turn to other methods. With whatever method you choose, your confidence must not wane. If think it will be effective, then it will.

Thanks for the question

–Miss Ari ^_^

Power Dynamic

I haven’t had the pleasure of knowing a woman that is in a female led relationship that was initiated by the male; however, from what i have heard, it is difficult for these women to come to terms with the new power dynamic.

The power dynamic is the basis of all femdom relationships but as the dominant woman, I decide the degree of of my power. A high power dynamic would include the woman making all decisions and the male not being allowed to decide anything. A low power dynamic would include decisions being made as a couple with the woman having the final say in everything. I personally favor a dynamic where the woman has all power of decision but the male has power of suggestion. Each of these dynamics are female led and it is the woman’s decision how the power dynamic will be displayed.

Regardless of the preferred dynamic, the important part is how you acquire that power. Even if the male offers you power over himself, you are still not in control until you decide that you are.

Now, no woman should feel like she must act manly to be in charge. There is no need for that. In fact, correctly harnessed female power is far more powerful than trying to be something that you are not.

There can and should be femininity in the way that you command. After all, it is the appeal anyway. Females gentleness should not be taken for weakness. However, it should still exist in a relationship along with every bit of firmness that she possesses.

–Miss Ari ^_^

The Hardest Part About This Blog

Class is not restricted by age.

Class is not restricted by age.

By far the pictures. I often find it difficult to find a picture depicting both elegance and female power. Most of the FemDom photos that can be found are vulgar to say the least. And a fair amount of picture of women in hosiery are of the same context. I need pictures that depict that hosiery is sexy, yes, but I also need pictures that do not make it seem sleazy.

This blog is restricted to the pictures of poise; of confident woman that know how to handle themselves in a manner that exceeds outsider opinions.

This is not something that I will settle on. I will not give in to something that is just okay. I will scavenge for the strong and accurate pictures. These days, we could use more determination in our lives even if we only start with something that may seem small.

I am not afraid to go first. I choose photos of the gentle prowess of the dominant woman and the men who love them.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Is it wrong?

Wrong? Don't be silly, darling. Does this feel wrong to you?

Wrong? Don’t be silly, darling. Does this feel wrong to you?

Well, what do you think? Because a majority of the people that ask this are not asking whether it is really wrong, but they are asking what they should think. They do not think it is wrong but society tells them that they should.

I don’t blame them for being skeptical. Skepticism is a critical part of surviving. So maybe, by popular definition it is weird. Maybe it doesn’t fit in too well; maybe it’s wrong, but it feels so good doesn’t it?

Your body screams for my dominance.
Your skin craves my caress.
Your heart yearns to be enveloped in the sound of my voice, no matter what the command.
Your very bones tremble as I leave.
Your mind surrendered long ago.
But it doesn’t matter because you trust me to think for you when you cannot think for yourself.

It is not ignorance that you live in. It’s not power craze that fuels me.
It is our essences folding together where they belong.
Your submission is bliss.

And at the end of the day, if we are apart, we are still together. Aren’t we?

You can still feel my hand entwined in your hair.

Is that wrong?

I don’t think so.

 

–Miss Ari ^_^

Disagreements in a FemDom relationship

Of course I will listen to your opinions. And of course I will have the final word

Of course I will listen to your opinions. And of course I will have the final word

It is my belief that in any healthy relationship, regardless of the power distribution, there should be no fights.

Disagreements, however, will always happen whether you want them to or not. One person may want one thing and the other person may want something different. Obvious solutions to disagreements are a lot of communication and compromise.

But how is this situation tackled in a relationship where there is power imbalance? What if the woman has final say in the decisions of a relationship? Wouldn’t that create a conflict?
The answer is no. In a FemDom relationship, compromise carries a different meaning. It is no longer, both parties attempting an equal sacrifice. It is now the dominant partners’ decision whether or not to implement the submissive wishes, and the submissive knowing that she has the option not to.

Any responsible Domme seeks knowledge about her submissive and takes it into consideration when making decisions. If not, bad things can happen.

A certain presentation of FemDom depicts the male’s presence making no changes to her decisions. This is unrealistic. Things like health and psychological strength have to be taken into account.

It may sound like a lot of pressure is being put on the dominant woman, and it probably is. It’s no secret that being dominant comes with responsibility. Conflicts should be tackled assuming that sort of responsibility.

A prime example is a dominant woman wanting to do a certain activity and the submissive not wanting this activity. The ultimate question is whether to push the submissive boundaries.

This can be looked at two ways. The first way is assuming that the submissive is apprehensive but is willing to accept her help and guidance into the new territory. This is ideal. In this case, the submissive should be pushed slightly to promote the growth of the relationship.

The second situation is if the submissive is unwilling to be pushed. In this case, the submissive will usually react with anger or resentment. These are the markings of a corrupt relationship. Pushing this type of submissive would cause more problems and not pushing this type of submissive would be a mockery of a FemDom relationship.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Thank you for all of the post requests I have gotten so far. If you’d like recognition for something you have requested, I am willing upon request.

What’s Wrong With Submissive men?

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Good boy.

One of the big arguments that I have come across does not even come from the male perspective. It comes from the females. Women will often complain that they do not want FemDom because they do not wish to mother their men.

This is a complaint that comes from uninformed individuals. Aside from cases where a man would have an actual or unhealthy attraction to his mother, such a thing should not be a cause for concern.

First of all, you will never be his mother. It is impossible and he knows this as well. Such a concern is not justified to belong toward FemDom. A mother will typically care for, discipline, as well as do things for the child. The mothers does this for the child simply because he will not be able to care for himself otherwise. FemDom is not meant to mimic this. FemDom is based off of a certain level of stratification that places the supportive role on the male. A submissive man will not want to be tucked in, spoon fed, and pampered like an infant. He will want to be lead firmly and lovingly so that he can be at his best as an adult, not a child.

Second, any feelings that he may have toward women being in charge are natural. They do not hinder his ability to be what you want him to be as well. He may be tall, strong, reliable, and providing. He will have the capabilities as the “regular man” desired by these opposing women. The only difference is that he will want to be able to come home and know exactly how he should resent himself for your approval.

He will want to know how to avoid your anger and exactly how to apologize for transgression.

He will want you, in all of your strengths and weaknesses.

He will want to learn your desires and your rejections.

He will want to be his best for you.

So, tell me. What is wrong with submissive men?

–Miss Ari ^_^

What Your Fears Are To Me

They are real despite what others might think.

They are thing I may not ever fear for myself, just as my fears are to you.

They can be lethal to our relationship if not handled properly.

They are nothing to be ashamed of;

nothing to hide from.

Your fears are bigger than I think they are;

and they are smaller than you think they are.

Your fears are a story written by your past;

and yet a path to a better future.

Your fears will bring us closer together.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Forgive yourself for me.

Forgive yourself for me.

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Poisonous Perfection

whip your life-oooooI’ve come across a few blogs by now with similar themes and I hope that mine is not interpreted as being a part of them.

Femdom is not an excuse to suggest that a woman or women in general are perfect. It is arguable that Femdom is a confidence booster but it certainly does not imply perfection.

Using the term Goddess, for example, is good in theory (if you are into that sort of thing) but should be used as a stage name. It should be understood that the “Goddess” is in fact not perfect. She can still fail. she can still make mistakes, over look details, and make misjudgments. Because at the end of the day, she is no ones Goddess but his. To all others, she may not be ordinary, but she is still human.

Similarly, is the idea of hosiery bringing an illusion of flawlessness. But an illusion is still an illusion. Skin may not be that soft, shiny, tan, or seemless when they are shed of their beautiful covering. I dont have to explain WHY I like hosiery. But I suppose I do have to explain that to me, it is not meant to be rid of flaw completely.

Perfection poisons the mind and take the form of rose colored GLASSES. It shocks everyone when they find out that this perfect person is prone to mistake. It devistates the mind of someone who thinks they cannot fail when, one day, they do not know what to do in a certain situation.

Such a poison hinders the ability to appologize for things like this. Something as simple as appologizing to a significant other becomes impossible because he is seen as beneath you in stature. A lot of these people would be surprised to see the reaction they would get after a simple appology. It shouldn’t be disgust or shame or loss of love. It should be respect for someone brave enough to know that they are not perfect.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Is Consistency in Training a Good Thing? Q and A.

Pay very close attention my darling. You must remember the rules... just incase I forget :p

Pay very close attention my darling. You must remember the rules… just incase I forget :p

Consistency. Is it a got thing or a bad thing?
Well, it depends; not on the person or the relationship; but simply how you think of consistency.
To some people, consistency in a relationship means that the relationship stays the same. The couple engages in the same activities as they did before. In this sense, no it is not a good thing. It is a bad thing to make a relationship into a routine.

But…

If we think of consistency as allowing solid expectations for behavior and holding him accountable to them, then YES. Consistency is imperitive.

“But what about keeping him on his toes?” You may ask.

Keeping him on his toes means that at no point will she tolerate a period of downtime in which he is allowed to be overtly disobedient.

“So no down time then?”

Down time doesn’t mean disobedience. It is important to be able to share each others company in a relaxed environment among others, but it is even more important to stay comfortable in your roles.

To a certain degree, you cannot change your expectation of his role daily. You will make him confused. But one of the hardest things to remember is that you have to teach him to like more than just your persona if the relationship is going to last.

It feels good to be back in America. I think the hardest part will be getting started with the blog again. Any requests?

misshosieryfetish@yahoo.com

–MIss Ari ^_^

What Kind of Sexy?

"Compared to others, I make sexy appear effortless. But in truth, everyone else is trying too hard anyway."

“Compared to others, I make sexy appear effortless. But in truth, everyone else is trying too hard anyway.”

In most western societies, young girls are taught that a good girl does not “act sexy”. This seems as if it would be a simple enough concept but things were still a tad confusing for me.

I am sure that I was not alone in wondering why “looking sexy” was so important when you were not allowed to act it. Upon questioning my mother about the topic she laughed softly and said. “Real women don’t act sexy. They ARE sexy.” (My mother was notorious for not explaining what she meant).

Now I was thoroughly confused. Not only was society giving me a double standard, but the person that I went to on order to clear things up, did not use the terminology the same way as mass media did. However, it took a few years before I was able to realize this.

What MaMa was saying, was that sexy is a product of mind frame and behavior. When a woman ACTS in a self loving and confident manner, then she IS sexy. When she has knowledge of how her body effects men, and can still ACT conservative or respectfully, then she IS sexy. This type of sexy is based on respect that can be acquired when a woman can behave a certain way along with her physically attractive features.

Now armed with a conclusion of what she meant, I came to the realization that the “popular sexy” attempted to skip the things that come before sexy. In this way, sexy means being promiscuous and dressing to reveal as much as possible.

Most women, if critiqued, will argue that this second kind of sexy is the only way to get a mans attention. (I always find it humorous when people argue my point for me.)

You see, the second kind of sexy may attract a mans attention, but that is all that it will attract. It will not attract his respect, admiration, or desire to please you. It will only attract a fleeting infatuation that will leave you in the same position that you began with.

It is acceptable to feel that you are sexy, and know that you are sexy, and even to act sexy. In simply depends on what kind of sexy.

–Miss Ari ^_^

Role Reversal V.S. Power Exchange

No matter how you describe it,  it is me over you.  And you just can't get enough of it, can you?

No matter how you describe it,
it is me over you.
And you just can’t get enough of it, can you?

I have seen this argument in many forums lately and I must admit that I had not put very much thought into the topic until reading these comments. The dispute is that these two phrases cannot be used interchangeably.

The argument on the other side is that they are practically the same thing. But they are not.

Power exchange involves one partner giving up power to the other. Simple, right.

Well, role reversal implies that the partner that is supposed to be, or usually is, dominant is acting in a submissive role. The offense comes when it is interpreted, in the FemDom sense, that the woman is submissive by default. In this way, the only way for a woman to be dominant would be through a role reversal. And that she cannot be naturally dominant.

Previously I would use neither phrase to describe a relationship, but if I did use one of them, I would use power exchange. I did not, however, mind reading a sentence where the other was used because it never occurred to me what it was implying. I would not be offended and I suppose that I still will not.

But it obviously matters to someone, so I thought that I should help them out a little.

–Miss Ari ^_^

His Hands Were Not Bound (fiction)

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His hands were not bound but he could not move. He was not gagged; not exactly, but he could not speak or see or hear, barely. Everything seemed so calm, though. There was no panic as he thought there would be. His heart hammered in his chest and that was all that he could focus on. He frowned as he wondered why that was suddenly all that he could feel as well. Something was missing.
She shook him harder. “Breathe.” She said in a commanding tone. He concluded that she had said so a few times before. He must not have heard her before.
Jim filled his lungs with air; sucking it in as if he were starving for it. Naomi smiled.
“There you go.” She said soothingly. She touched his hair as she looked down at him. Jim looked up at her unaware of the affect that his helpless expression was having on her. She smiled again.
He saw her upside down. To his right and left he could feel her thighs on his ears as she knelt above his head. Her weight was currently resting on her feet which were folded beneath her bottom.
She had previously been sitting over him, smothering him slightly with her loveliness. He was not entirely sure when she lifted herself off or how long she sat.
“Wha…” Jim licked his lips as his mouth was suddenly very dry. “What happened?”
Jim watched Naomi’s dark red lips move as she spoke.
“I reminded you to breathe. I was sure that you had enough room to, but I do not think that you heard me. I decided to check on you.”
“Did I pass out?” Jim asked. He heard his voice as he spoke but he was not sure how she was able to hear him. He was speaking so softly and meekly. He was surprised at the small sound that his voice seemed to favor at the moment.
Naomi was still smiling and touching his hair gently. He tried to resist the urge to moan at her caress, but he failed. He moaned softly and began to blush, feeling embarrassed. But when he looked at her face, he did not know what he was so embarrassed about. She looked as if she almost expected him to react this way to her touch.
“No.” She said answering his question. “But when I looked at you, you looked so… You seemed spaced out, conscious, but in another world entirely.”
“Subspace.” Jim said before he had a chance to stop himself.
Naomi nodded. “You told me about that. How do you know all of these new terms?”
“I read them somewhere on the internet.” Jim said, suddenly unable to remember where exactly he had read them or why he had done so.
“And?”
Jim could not answer her. He did not understand.
“Did you like it?”
“Well, I don’t know. I have never felt this way before. It is so strange. I–I don’t dislike it.”
Naomi smiled. “Do you want to do it again?”
Jim nodded immediately.

“Then you like it.”

Jim’s eyes went slightly wide. Of course he liked it; it made sense now. Why had he hesitated before?

She stopped touching his hair for a few moments. “I liked it.” She proclaimed. Jim was a bit shocked. He had though that she would find it weird or disgusting. He had not expected that she would even try it. Even when she agreed, he thought she was just doing it because he wanted to. But he was wrong. She actually enjoyed it!

“I like what it does to you. I like the way it makes you look at me.” He could tell by her smile that he was still looking at her in that way that she liked. “I definitely want to do it again.”

Jim thought as he gazed up at her. How had this all happened? It started as a simple conversation about the things he had been reading. Anything that they did usually began as a simple conversation. Jim and Naomi met in history class. They were both fifteen minutes early and after only three minutes, they were talking politics and quiet studying spots on campus. Jim was good at talking but he was never very good at putting his ideas into action. Naomi was great at that. Sometimes if he wasn’t careful what he said around her, he would end up willingly doing something that he had previously had no interest in. She had a hold over him that way.

He couldn’t resist her direction and he could never bring himself to complain about it.

“Are you ready?” Naomi asked raising up onto her knees.

Jim raised his eyebrows. “You meant now?”

Naomi nodded as she began to lower herself slowly over his face. The light faded away as he felt her come into contact with him. He could feel her warmth. He could smell her arousal. He felt surrounded by her. He couldn’t imagine anything better.

Naomi’s hand stroking his chest reminded him that he should breathe as he lost all train of thought again.

–Miss Ari ^_^

 

For stories from my personal relationship, see my other blog.

Taking Notice

Pay attention my dear. Or you will miss something very important... and I will be displeased.

Pay attention my dear. Or you will miss something very important… and I will be displeased.

I like to think of being the author of a blog as being just like any other author. (Hopefully) you write because you like to, and 70% of the time it’s fantastic! (10% of the time you get to enjoy writers block) But 20% of the time you realize that what you write down may only make sense to you.

Your readers may be fans of your work; they may comment on their favorite part. But the odds are that they will not read your work and think the same things that you did when you wrote it.

I started this blog because in May 2014 I did an internet search using only the word “FemDom”. Can you guess what the search results were? They were porn. Almost every single one of them. And a lot of them were cruel depictions of pain, anger, spite, and torment in the name of revenge. It is no wonder FemDom is not wide spread, because this is what it looks like to people who would conduct the internet search.

With that said, I would like to draw the attention of my readers to a few things.

I hope that you all will take notice that…

This blog is NOT porn. I attempt to post images that depict FemDom without blatant nudity. And I do this on purpose. FemDom is not solely about sex and so there should be a place for FemDom to be discussed in a practical or sensual sense.

This blog is NOT violence. I do not promote physical disfigurement or excessive violence, and again I do this for a reason. Because such acts of “play” can only exist in fantasy for a small period of time. And accomplishes little real domination. Such intensity can no longer be called sensual and it, therefore, has no home on this blog.

This blog is NOT abuse. I do not suggest relationships where submissive men are used by women who only wish to harm them. So much happens before, during, and after any type of pain that the submissive receives and I hope to explain it all. On this log, submission is a form of strength and it is valued.

Lastly, this blog IS a place that I hope will reach many people and help them come above the ideas that may scare the away from FemDom. And if I don’t reach anyone else… At least I have reached you 🙂

–Miss Ari ^_^

Bad Advice Part 4: Strap-on Play (the Concept)

nets and heels

This post may be very closely related to another post of mine where I discuss some of the ideas that I consider to be problematic in FemDom literature. Most (if not all) of the bad advice associated with strap-on play comes from erotic stories.

There are a number of sites (“vanilla” and “kinky” alike) that offer advice for anal play but, some how, as soon as the idea is introduced into a FemDom story, all precaution is forgotten.

That said, safety is not even the biggest issue in these stories. The biggest issue is a false representation of FemDom. In a majority of the FemDom stories I have read, strap-on’s are portrayed as a way to stand in for something that the dominant woman lacks. A penis.

I am not at all stating that there is anything wrong with having such an organ, but there certainly is something wrong with the idea that the lack of one is looked down upon. By this definition, every woman is made to seem inadequate and the only way that she can be truly dominant, is by means of a false phallus.

I will admit that this reasoning is hard to detect at first. I first noticed it when I read a phrase in a short story where the Dominant Woman states that she is sorry that she doesn’t have anything for him to swallow. (just imagine the context)

Why should she be sorry for something like that? How could she feel the need to apologize for not being a man? This is not at all what FemDom is about. FemDom is about fulfilling the will of the female. If that will includes her enjoying him in this way, then that is her decision. The strap-on is a tool of convenience for the woman. It is not a way for the woman to seek her dominance through taking on the form of a man.

–Miss Ari ^_^

 

P.S. Not all FemDom literature experiences are bad ones. Here is a link to a short story that I did enjoy, sent to me by one of my blog’s followers. Enjoy.

P.P.S. For stories from my personal relationship, see my other blog.

 

What I Look For in a Submissive Man

It's a hunt! And your my prey, darling.

It’s a hunt! And your my prey, darling.

What Dominant Women look for in a submissive? I find this question a lot on the internet. I also find that there aren’t that many real answers available.

Let’s fix that.

Now, I can’t speak for the “Dominatrix type” of Dominant Woman. And I can’t speak on behalf of women who claim to be “switch women”. I can only speak for myself; a Dominant Woman, attracted to submissive men, looking for a valuable partner rather than a quick scene to fuel fantasies. I can’t even speak for every real Dominant Woman because everyone has their own preferences. But I can definitely give some insight on the basic things that a Dominant Woman looks for in a partner. 

1) Cleanliness!

It probably sounds odd to mention such a thing as a first priority, but I find that I am always way more attracted to a man that is dressed and smells clean than I am to the most submissive man in the world. This does not mean wearing a lot of cologne. It means making yourself appear more healthy and organized by taking care of your self and choosing clothing that is appropriate looks good on you and is clean.

2) Manners

Now that we have gotten the basics out of the way, we can move on to manners. This one should be obvious, though. The best way to get a Dominant Woman’s attention is to willingly treat her as she needs to be treated. Manners need to be physical and verbal. Do not call her Mistress or Queen or Boss. It is just a bad idea; you don’t know what she wants to be called, and you could risk embarrassing yourself and ruining your chances (or confusing her if she isn’t familiar with FemDom terms). Be courteous.

3) Talents/ Interesting traits

This one is probably unexpected. The third thing I always look for is something that “sparkles”. It doesn’t have to be amazing, or revolutionary, or even all that interesting to me. You play an instrument? That’s lovely. You speak multiple languages? Me too; I am intrigued. You like murder mystery novels? I don’t care for them, but I’d still like to know.

What I know about you, helps me make predictions as to how you would react to me if we were ever intimate. Make sense now?

This is my opportunity to get into your head, so be prepared.

4) Submission

This is where I start to look for submissive behavior. I am attracted to submissive men. It’s almost natural for me to recognize submissive behaviors. It is likely that other Dominant Women will do the same. Some common things I notice are submissive body language (placing me in a more respectable or higher position than himself) and verbal submissive behavior (verbally admitting my leadership/superiority).

A few things to notice here are how I never said that Dominantrix or FemDom experience is a prerequisite. Experience in serving another woman means absolutely nothing to me. I have my own needs and desires. I never gave a preference for race (how can I?). I never mentioned money either. Money is a plus and the lack thereof is a minor drawback, not a deal breaker.

–MIss Ari ^_^