Black and White ~ Ready

You knew I liked leather. Now, I think that’s what attracted you to me in the first place. You thought I wasn’t like the average woman and maybe, just maybe, I’d be open to those things you think about when you’re all alone at night.

Last month when you finally confessed all your dirty little secrets to me, I was a bit taken aback. But I meant it when I said I would think about it, and I have. Now I’ve been doing some internet research, and I’ve been finding out what all of your desires really entail. I’m not sure how many of them I’ll actually like. But I’m interested enough to give it all a try.

This collar is the first of many things I’ll be buying for our exploration. I’m ready. Are you?


This is your last chance. If you’re really up to this, then crawl toward me and submit to my will. Go on and take a few minutes to decide. I don’t want you trying to change your mind later.

–Miss Ari ^_^


Why the Hosiery?

Isn't it clear that I have expectations of you, My dear boy?

Isn’t it clear that I have expectations of you, My dear boy?

“What is the use for hosiery in the FemDom practice? There is nothing on the list of FemDom uses for pantyhose that cannot simply be done with a few purchases from a BDSM site. So why even own a pair?”

These are questions I’ve never been asked, but I’m sure someone has thought of. To many women, the answer is obvious, but for those of you whom are still perplexed, let me explain.

Something happens in the mind of a woman when she suits herself up from head to toe in leather; when she covers with skins that are not her own, when she goes through her toy box for whatever flogger will be her favorite for the evening. Something changes as she transforms herself into the image that she believes to be a dominant woman. Often times she may loose herself completely. She will become a personality that she will immediately toss aside as soon as she sheds herself of the leather corset. It is difficult to see the problem here at first, because there should be nothing wrong with being a dominant woman. She may be completely in control throughout the whole ‘scene’. She will break her slave an remind him to whom he belongs, but when this dominant woman sets down her whip, she has lost all of that. The activities that took place are now in the past and will not reoccur until the leather is back on her body. In essence, this woman is not dominant at all; she is just a really good actress. 

When female domination happens without these things present, then they are not associated with her dominance. Suddenly it was not the paddle in her hand that made her so intimidating; suddenly it was not the crotchless leather pants, or the whip, or the dildo that made her so dominant. It was just her. Every dominant woman needs to be reminded that the things that she thought were essential in order to be a good Domme, were not needed at all. All that was needed was her. 

So why the essential pantyhose, then?

Well, for one it is a confidence booster. But not in the same way as fetish wear is. Unless you are a dominatrix, you would not wear your fetish wear all day long. She would, however, wear hosiery to work or shopping or whatever else she enjoys. She did not have to change what she looks like in order to act like a dominant woman later on in the evening. She COULD have been dominant at any point in the day. She simply chose not to. 

Other than that, hosiery give the illusion of flawlessness. It shows femininity with any ensemble. It shows modesty (even if it is partly satirical). And it shows that she has class and is to be respected. 

If I had it my way, everyone would understand this. But since we all already have an agreement, I just thought I’d explain.

–Miss Ari ^_^

What kind of Domme are you?

"Don't let my Kimono fool you. If you are going to hit on me, you must do it on your knees!"

“Don’t let my Kimono fool you. If you are going to hit on me, you must do it on your knees!”

Definitely a question that I wish people would ask more often. So many people are plagued with the idea that if you are a dominant woman, you must be wearing a leather corset under your blouse and carrying a whip in your purse.

I think perhaps it is that people are confusing these woman with a dominatrix. Just because I am sexually aggressive in bed does not mean that I wear these.

No way I am going to stand up in these.

No way I am going to stand up in these.

Yes, it is true that a huge element of FemDom is dressing the part, but everyone seems to think that there is only one way to do this. To quote a blog that I admire, “And I’ll play wearing fuzzy slippers if I damned well want to!”

I actually do not own a pair of fuzzy slippers, but you will get the idea. If I tell you that I am a domme, it is rude to assume that I dress and behave a certain way.

Malaysian FemDom attire looks like this.

flower shirt meichinmyblog

Its always beautiful, always sexy, and this particular outfit looks rather comfortable. Going by the way people think dominant women are supposed to dress, this woman is not supposed to be dominant.

But the truth is, there are many types of dommes. Some like business attire, some dress like geisha’s, some like to dress like biker girls, some like to dress like gothis ballerina’s, some like to dress like this…

Haha, i am just kidding... sort of ^o^

Haha, i am just kidding… sort of ^o^

And some just like to dress normal… go figure.

Just because I don’t wear leather pants during a ‘session’, doesn’t make me any less dominant than the next woman. And if I did decide to conform to what I think a dominant woman is supposed to wear, then it wouldn’t be called an alternative lifestyle, would it?

…Just a thought.

–Miss Ari ^_^